Senate Approves Torture
WASHINGTON (Reuters) - The U.S. Senate on Thursday gave final approval to a bill for tough interrogation and prosecution of terrorism suspects, as President George W. Bush prevailed after a series of setbacks on his detainee policies.
The Senate passed the bill 65-34, hours after Bush was on Capitol Hill urging Republicans to stay behind the high-profile measure ahead of November 7 elections that will determine control of Congress.
The House of Representatives passed the same measure on Wednesday and must make a technical change to reconcile it with the Senate's. Bush was expected to sign it soon afterward.
While the bill cleared the Senate by a comfortable margin, it barely survived an earlier challenge that would have delayed and possibly killed it.
"The Senate sent a strong signal to the terrorists that we will continue using every element of national power to pursue our enemies and to prevent attacks on America," Bush said in a statement after the Senate vote.
"The Military Commissions Act of 2006 will allow the continuation of a CIA program that has been one of America's most potent tools in fighting the war on terror," Bush said.
The bill sets standards for interrogating suspects, but through a complex set of rules that human rights groups said could allow harsh techniques that bordered on torture such as sleep deprivation and induced hypothermia.
It establishes military tribunals that would allow some use of evidence obtained by coercion, but would give defendants access to classified evidence being used to convict them.
The bill also expands the definition of "enemy combatants" mostly held at the U.S. prison at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, to include those who provide weapons, money and other support to terrorist groups.
The Supreme Court struck down Bush's first system of military commissions to try suspects, leaving the process in limbo with no successful prosecutions since the September 11 attacks. Bush then faced a rebellion over his revised plan that three leading Republican senators said would allow abusive interrogations and unfair trials.
AGGRESSIVE INTERROGATIONS ALLOWED
After a high-stakes negotiation, Bush got much of what he wanted in the bill to continue the once-secret CIA program of detention and aggressive interrogations of suspects that critics said amounted to torture.
Democrats and some Republicans criticized the compromise for stripping detainees of rights to launch court challenges of their detentions.
Voting 51-48, Republicans beat an amendment that would have restored those rights and potentially derailed the bill. Four Republicans and one Democrat crossed party lines on the vote.
Senate Judiciary Committee Chairman Arlen Specter of Pennsylvania said the right to challenge one's detention was fundamental in American law, and the Supreme Court would reject the plan if it were stripped.
"This is wrong. It is unconstitutional. It is un-American," said Patrick Leahy of Vermont, the committee's top Democrat. He said it was intended to choke off access to Guantanamo to "ensure that the Bush-Cheney administration will never again be embarrassed by a United States Supreme Court decision reviewing its unlawful abuses of power."
Most Republicans said lawsuits from Guantanamo inmates were clogging the courts and detracted from the war on terrorism.
Alabama Sen. Jeff Sessions said the bill should not "create a long-term battle with the courts over everybody that's being detained. It is a function of the military and the executive branch to conduct a war."
Republicans on tight votes beat several other challenges by Democrats who said the bill fell short of fair judicial standards and would spark more international outrage at the U.S. treatment of detainees since the September 11 attacks.
"This bill gives an administration that lobbied for torture exactly what it wanted," said Sen. John Kerry, a Massachusetts Democrat.
But Armed Services Committee Chairman John Warner, a Virginia Republican, said enemy combatants were "unlawful by all international standards in the manner in which they conduct war, and yet this great nation ... is going to mete out a measure of justice."
Hammond Heads Home
LONDON (Reuters) - Top Gear presenter Richard Hammond was flown by helicopter from Leeds General Infirmary to a hospital nearer his home on Thursday, health officials said.
Hammond, 36, was transferred from the West Yorkshire hospital by air ambulance only eight days after he was seriously injured in a high-speed car crash.
"He is continuing to do well and was obviously stable enough to be moved," a Leeds General Infirmary spokeswoman said.
Hammond was taken to an undisclosed hospital near his Gloucestershire home, a BUPA spokeswoman added.
The father-of-two suffered a significant brain injury in the jet-powered car accident at an RAF airfield near York.
He was moved from a high dependency ward to a side-room on a general ward in the Leeds hospital on Saturday.
The accident was jointly investigated by police and the Health and Safety Executive.
The BBC has postponed the new series of Top Gear until Hammond has recovered.
Well-wishers have donated tens of thousands of pounds to a charity for the Yorkshire Air Ambulance, which airlifted the presenter to hospital.
Bush Seeks To Legalize Torture
The US House of Representatives has voted 253-168 in favor of tough new anti-terror laws that will retrospectively protect CIA torturers from prosecution under US War Crimes legislation.
Democrat Steve Israel said "The bill says to terrorists that we are abandoning the moral high ground, this is a bad move in fighting terrorism and bad for America."
Republican House Speaker, Dennis Hastert, said Democrats had "voted in favor of more rights for terrorists".
"So these same terrorists who plan to harm innocent Americans, and their freedom worldwide would be coddled if we followed the Democrat plan."
The bill will not change Geneva Convention protection to enemy combatants, but its guidelines allow
‘tough interrogations’ and Presidential discretion when it comes to defining what methods are used.
Detainees will also be stripped of their right to appeal their detention in US courts. It was the appeals process that led to the US Supreme Court ruling that the activities at Guantanamo Bay were ‘unconstitutional’.
The bill still needs Senate approval, but it looks likely it will succeed.
Republican Congressmen after the vote
Nice One!
Here's a Pagani Zonda that's seen better days,
and what's left of a Lamborghini Murcielago (the driver insists he wasn't at fault).
www.wreckedexotics.com
Fried Rice
Senator Hillary Clinton has laid the smackdown on Condoleeza Rice following Dr Rice's comments that Bill Clinton lied about his administration's anti-terror plans. Hillary responded by calling George W Bush an incompetent jackass for ignoring a document called
Bin Laden Determined to Attack Inside United States in August 2001.
Rice then called Hillary out, and the two tussled in an 80s film montage. The senator beat the doctor with a particularly nasty bitch-slap upside the head, and called Rice a skank before asking a passerby if he had a cigar.
Colorado High School Shooting
A man has killed a schoolgirl and himself in a siege at Platte Canyon High School, Colorado.
http://www.smh.com.au/news/world/two-dead-after-school-siege/2006/09/28/1159337247320.html
Slightly Disturbing
There's been a lot said about the negative impact that models can have on teenage girls, but what about the girls who
are models? The young (and I do mean young, she's only 13) girl pictured here is Shelby Kelly from the mid-north coast of New South Wales. Shelby will be competing in a modelling competition in Shanghai with the hopes of scoring a career on the catwalk.
We know that being a child star can be harmful to you, but they're not being asked to pose in a suggestive manner. If you're an adult and want to do that, fine, but Shelby's only 13.
I know that the Political Correctness Police will probably have a go at me, but a 13 year old girl should not wear a see-through top or open her shirt like this.
Bird Flu Hits Sydney
An international traveler arriving from Vietnam may have brought avian flu to Australia. And in a stunning example of Aussie Stupidity, the passengers around him were sent home, possibly carrying the deadly virus. Health officials have downplayed the chances of this being a case of bird flu, but News In Briefs doesn't trust them.
SAVE TOP GEAR
Fools and mummy's boys are trying to get Top Gear kicked off the air. Sign a petition here:
http://www.petitiononline.com/tg100/petition.htmlHow else will we find out about performance comparos between Lamborghinis and Zondas?
Hammond Wants To Show Crash
Top Gear star begs BBC to show 280mph car crashLast updated at 11:43am on 26th September 2006With Top Gear facing the axe, injured presenter Richard Hammond has begged the BBC to show the 280mph car crash that almost killed him.
In a bid to save the motoring show, the 36-year-old is also prepared to appear on television live from his hospital bed as BBC bosses have said they will only screen the new series if Hammond is well enough to appear on it.
Hammond, who suffered a serious brain injury after his jet-powered dragster crashed, is desperate to get in front of a camera as he is worried the programme will be cancelled before he has had a chance to recover from his injuries.
A friend of the presenter, told the Daily Star: "Richard could not stand to feel he was to blame for the demise of the show he loves.
"He's fuming they've postponed the next series because he fears that's the first step towards the BBC pulling the plug permanently. He's terrified they're going to axe it while he's stuck in hospital.
"He'll do anything to keep Top Gear going, even if it means broadcasting from his hospital bed. It would be an emotional broadcast for everyone involved and a ratings winner."
Hammond, affectionately nicknamed the Hamster, has been angered by rumours that Top Gear's future is in doubt as the new series which was due to be aired on October 8 has been postponed indefinitely.
Now out of intensive care at Leeds General Infirmary the presenter has amazed doctors with his fast recovery as only last week his life hanged in the balance.
Reunited with his two daughters Isabella, five, and Willow, two, he is now walking, talking and eating.
Producer Andy Wilman has threatened to quit the show if the BBC try to tone down the show's emphasis on speed and stunts.
While co-presenter Jeremy Clarkson, 46, said: "Swarms of bureaucratic bluebottles are nibbling away at the crash site on York airfield desperately trying to find some reason why Top Gear should be banished from our screens."
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/showbiz/showbiznews.html?in_article_id=407022&in_page_id=1773
Quirky
While searching for a picture of a Mars Bar, Google returned this photo:
What the hell is this thing?
I've Had Enough
I don't want to hear the name Steve Irwin for a long time, I don't want to see his picture, and I don't want to see his widow's interview. Go find another fixation! I'm sure Lindsay Lohan is bulemic again or something...
A Great Choice
According to Choice Magazine, a Mars Bar is a healthier breakfast than a K-Time Breakfast Bar. So next time you want a quick brekky from the servo, let your taste decide. After all, it helps you work, rest and play.
http://www.smh.com.au/articles/2006/09/25/1159036472167.html
Hammond Getting Better
Richard Hammond, the Top Gear presenter, has continued to make a remarkable recovery from his 300mph dragster crash, and was yesterday well enough to be cared for in a general ward and share jokes with his family and friends.
Hammond suffered a "significant brain injury" in last week's accident but, after spells in intensive care and a high dependency unit, was moved to the side room of a general ward at the weekend. A spokesman for Leeds general infirmary said last night: "He is continuing to make good progress. He is doing well."
Meanwhile, Hammond's co-presenter, Jeremy Clarkson, launched a scathing attack on investigators looking into the crash, and commentators who have suggested the macho, speed-loving BBC2 motoring show ought to be toned down.
Clarkson claimed: "Swarms of bureaucratic bluebottles are nibbling away at the crash site, desperately trying to find some reason Top Gear should be banished from the screens." Writing in the Sunday Times, he added: "Contrary to reports that he was put there [in the dragster] by ratings-hungry producers, it was his idea. He wanted to know what it would be like to go really fast ... He needs that thrill as passionately as a heroin addict needs his next fix."
According to Clarkson, the crash, on Wednesday, was probably caused by a burst tyre. "Who was to blame? Nobody."
The BBC said it was too early to say when the new series of Top Gear, which was due to begin on October 8, would now start. Meanwhile, more than 40,000 people have wished Hammond well and, by last night, £140,000 had been donated to the Yorkshire Air Ambulance, which ferried him to hospital.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk_news/story/0,,1880086,00.html
How Long???
Browsing through the Sydney Morning Herald today, I was reminded of how long it's ben since we were promised Guns N Roses'
Chinese Democracy. And with talk of electoral reform in Hong Kong, it seems like we might actually see a Chinese democracy first.
Hammond Walks
British motoring show presenter Richard Hammond has got out of bed and walked after suffering brain injuries in a high-speed crash, co-host of Top Gear Jeremy Clarkson told The Sun newspaper on Saturday.
"In the wee small hours of Thursday night, just 30 hours after what is almost certainly the world's fastest-ever car crash, Richard Hammond suddenly sat up in bed opened his eyes and asked what had happened," wrote Clarkson in his Sun column.
"'You've been in a car accident'," I said. "'Was I driving badly?' he asked, before getting out of bed and walking shakily to the lavatory."
A Leeds General Infirmary hospital spokeswoman told Reuters that Hammond continues to "make good progress".
Hammond's wife Mindy also provided an upbeat assessment of her husband's medical condition.
"He's spoken and smiled. It's early days and what has happened hasn't really sunk in for him," she told The Daily Mirror newspaper.
Hammond, 36, was seriously injured on Wednesday when he crashed a jet-powered dragster as he accelerated towards 300 miles per hour (483kmh) in a feature being filmed for the BBC show.
He suffered what his doctors have called a significant brain injury as a result of the accident at an RAF airfield near York.
Although doctors remain concerned about his condition they have said they are "reasonably optimistic that he will make a good recovery".
The accident is being jointly investigated by police and the Health and Safety Executive.
Hammond had been filming at the Elvington airfield in what media reports said was an attempt to break the British land speed record of 300.3 miles per hour (483.18kph) when the accident happened.
A spokesman for the car's sponsor, auto accessory maker Thule, has said that although timers were in place to record Hammond's speed, it would not have qualified as an official record attempt.
smh.com.au
Even Monsters Get The Blues
Newsmedia Flogs A Dead Horse
FOR a few days, the nation's born-again Christians were overjoyed: could it be that Steve Irwin, crocodile hunter, had become one of them shortly before a stingray's barb cut short his life?
The rumour began to circulate after Creation Ministries International, a conservative group believing in a literal reading of the Book of Genesis, reported the contents of an email from a church pastor that Irwin had "come forward" at a Sunshine Coast church two weeks before his death.
The rumour spread like wildfire. The email read in part: "Many of us will now spend eternity with him. I am sure Terri [Irwin] is comforted as a Christian in the fact that she will be with Jesus and also Steve again for eternity."
But as encouraging as it might be for Christians to know they may share heaven with Irwin, the group now concedes there is reason to doubt the conversion. The unverified story was sent out by an exuberant staff member, said the group's managing director, Carl Wieland. "Though we are able to substantiate our suggestion that Steve's wife, Terri, was a church-going Christian, the stories of Steve coming forward can, at this stage, not be substantiated," he said in a statement on the group's website.
"There is serious reason to doubt that this happened, at least not in the way that the stories claim. Each time, seemingly reliable witnesses are invoked, but they are never the actual eyewitnesses … At least one major church [believed to be a Pentecostal church in Adelaide] … announced it joyfully from the pulpit. But there again it turned out to be on the basis of seemingly reliable, almost impeccable eyewitness testimony, but testimony which could, again, not be confirmed, sadly."
A Sunshine Coast pastor, Steve Penny, said that if Irwin converted it was not at his church. Further investigation had failed to substantiate rumours of the conversion in any church on the coast, he said.
Mr Wieland said the rumour had been consigned to "well-meant urban legend". "It is, ultimately, a matter between Steve Irwin and his creator and if the event did occur, then since Terri Irwin is a believer, she will be highly motivated to let the world know."
-smh.com.au
Hammond Update
Presenter of British motoring program Top Gear Richard Hammond suffered a significant brain injury in a high-speed crash in a jet-powered car while filming for the program, a hospital spokesman said today.
"He has suffered a significant brain injury," the spokesman said.
"It is still giving cause for concern as it is still early after the injury. However, we are reasonably optimistic that he will make a good recovery."
The 36-year-old presenter was taken by air ambulance to the specialist neurological unit at Leeds General Infirmary after the accident yesterday.
Earlier today, the hospital had said Hammond was in a serious but stable condition after some improvement overnight.
The presenter had been filming at a former Royal Air Force base near York, in what media reports said was an attempt to break the British land speed record of 300.3 mph (483.18 km), when the accident happened yesterday afternoon.
A spokesman for the car's sponsor, Thule, said that although timers were in place to record Hammond's speed, it would not have qualified as an official record attempt.
Health and Safety Executive officials were on site investigating possible causes of the crash.
Co-presenters Jeremy Clarkson and James May have both visited their colleague in hospital.
"Obviously, at this time both he and his family are the most important concerns we have," they said in a statement.
"It must be devastating for his wife Mindy and his two utterly adorable children. Both James and I are looking forward to getting our hamster back."
Hammond is affectionately known as "The Hamster" by his legion of fans and is the butt of good-natured ribbing about his diminutive height by Clarkson and May.
He had to be cut from the wreckage of the vehicle which had veered off the track and rolled over, the BBC quoted one of the rescuers as saying.
"We were down there with Top Gear who were filming him trying to break the British land speed record," Dave Ogden, one of those involved in the rescue, told the BBC.
"On the previous run, the car had just gone over 300 mph but I am not sure if it had broken the record.
"They had just done one more run and were planning to finish when it veered off to the right."
Hammond had been able to talk to but was in distress, he added.
"He was regaining consciousness at that point and said he had some lower back pain. But he was drifting in and out of consciousness a little bit," Ogden said.
The Top Gear show, which tests and reviews cars, enjoys cult status and is broadcast to millions of people worldwide on BBC World.
Quentin Willson, one of the show's former hosts, said of Hammond: "He is a wonderful, unique and distinctive Top Gear presenter.
"He has brought an awful lot to the program and his indefatigable energy, the fact that he tries absolutely anything once, may have been the reason that he has overstepped the mark a bit."
REUTERS
Hamster Update
By Brian LysaghtSept. 21 (Bloomberg) -- Richard Hammond, a host of the British Broadcasting Corp.'s Top Gear television program, is in serious condition at a U.K. hospital after he crashed a 300 miles-per-hour, jet-powered dragster at a test track.
Hammond, 36, was driving a car called the Vampire while filming for the show when the accident occurred yesterday at Elvington Airfield, east of York, in northern England, the BBC said on its Web site.
He was taken by helicopter to Leeds General Infirmary. Hammond is in serious but stable condition and there was some improvement overnight, said a hospital spokeswoman who didn't give her name.
Dave Ogden, a firefighter who was working with the film crew at the track, told the BBC that Hammond was attempting to break the British land-speed record when the accident occurred. The car had done a run at over 300 mph, then on another pass veered to the right and flipped with one of its parachutes out.
A 30-foot (9-meter) long yellow Vampire powered by a Rolls- Royce aircraft engine and driven by Colin Fallows touched 300 mph to break the British land speed record at Elvington in 2000. It wasn't clear whether Hammond was driving the same car.
Top Gear is scheduled to begin its ninth season on the air next month. It runs on Sunday nights, when Hammond and co-hosts Jeremy Clarkson and James May test cars ranging from exotic roadsters to wrecks, and record the adventures for the program.
Colleagues VisitClarkson and May said they traveled to the hospital today.
``I would just like to say how heartened Richard will be when I tell him just how many motorists and truck drivers on my way here wound down their windows to say they were rooting for him,'' Clarkson said in an e-mailed statement.
In the show, Clarkson has nicknamed the diminutive and excitable Hammond ``hamster.''
The crash will be investigated by the government's Health & Safety Executive as well as the BBC, the broadcaster said in a statement yesterday.
``We are looking into all the factors of this accident and it would be inappropriate to comment further at this stage until we know the full situation,'' the BBC said.
Shocking
A Vietnamese man who once appeared on national television to demonstrate his ability to resist electric shocks has been electrocuted while repairing a generator, an official said on Tuesday.
Nguyen Van Hung, aged in his early 40s, was killed in Tay Ninh province near the Cambodian border while repairing the generator without first cutting the power supply, a local official said.
"When alive, he used to demonstrate at our office how he would insert two fingers into the electrical plughole without problems," the official said.
Hung, nicknamed "Hung Electric", had appeared on television's "Strange Stories of Vietnam".
Reuters
Jake's Gun 'Just Went Off'
I have a whole lot of time for our servicemen and women, my best mate wears a uniform each day. But this whole Kovco thing is starting to smell like Tupac and Biggie. His widow's description of what she
thinks happened is remarkably similar to a scene from Pulp Fiction, where Vincent Vega shoots Marvin.
"Look! I didn't mean to shoot this son-of-a-bitch, the gun just went off, don't ask me how! " I'm calling that Kovco was murdered, and someone's trying to cover it up. It's the only theory that fits the facts.
Top Gear Star Stable
We've just heard that Richard Hammond is now in a stable condition. The 36 year old was allegedly travelling at around 300mph when he lost control of the jet-powered dragster. That, as Hammond would say, is un-ba-lee-vably quick.
GGGGOOOOOAAAAALLLLL!!!!!!!!
Xabi Alonso is our new hero, scoring an AWESOME goal against Newcastle in Liverpool's 2-0 win. The Spaniard's boot met ball inside his own half at Anfield in the 79th minute. Notable mention to Dirk Kuyt who scored the first goal.
Hurt Hamster
Top Gear host critical after crash
Press AssociationThursday September 21, 2006 2:28 AMTop Gear presenter Richard Hammond was in a critical condition in hospital after he was involved in a high-speed car crash while filming for the programme.
Hammond, 36, was airlifted to Leeds General Infirmary after a "rocket-powered dragster" he was in crashed at Elvington airfield near York.
The editor of Top Gear magazine said he had heard that Hammond may have been travelling at speeds close to 300mph before the crash.
Inspector Mike Thompson, of North Yorkshire Police, said: "At 5.45pm (on Wednesday) evening we received a report via the fire service of a male person trapped in what was described as an overturned jet car which had been driven on the airfield. The male occupant has received serious injuries and has been airlifted to hospital at Leeds."
A hospital spokesman said Hammond, who is being treated in a neurological unit, was in a "critical" condition.
Hammond, who often drives high-performance cars as part of presenting Top Gear, was born in Birmingham but lives just outside Cheltenham with his wife and children. He first appeared on British television screens on cable and satellite channels presenting motoring programmes before switching to the BBC's Top Gear in 2002.
A BBC spokeswoman said: "We can confirm that an accident has happened while filming an edition of Top Gear at an airfield near York. The presenter Richard Hammond has been taken to hospital. The incident happened quite recently and the focus of our attention is on Richard at this stage."
Top Gear magazine editor Michael Harvey told BBC News 24: "I know every single precaution will have been taken but something clearly absolutely unaccounted for has gone wrong, and Richard has unfortunately suffered the consequences."
James May, who co-presents the popular motor show with Hammond and Jeremy Clarkson, said he was devastated to learn his "old mate" had been injured.
Former Top Gear presenter Quentin Willson said one of Hammond's best qualities was that he has "no fear". He told BBC News 24: "It does sound very serious. It is a huge, huge tragedy. He is a wonderful, unique and distinctive Top Gear presenter."
100th Post!
At the time of writing, News In Briefs has featured 17 politicians, 54 celebrities, 43 serious stories, and has gotten 94 comments. It's been eventful, with people giggling at absurdity and loading up guns in defence of their faith. We're off to party, normal service will resume tomorrow.
Hey, Check This Out!
This isn't strictly news, but lets face it, you weren't looking for news.
I found an X-Men personality quiz while surfing today, and I scored as the Beast!
"Beast is an intelligent, politcal spokesman for the X-Men. He has a Ph.D in Genetics and is well versed in literature. He may look like a blue fuzzy monster, but deep down he's very benevolent and logical. Powers: Enhanced strength and agility." 
This is the coolest freakin' thing I've seen all day. And Beast was played by Kelsey Grammar, who was in Frasier, so... yeah.
The Continuing Story Of Bungling Benny
John Howard is shocked by Muslim anger at recent comments made by the Pope
(before reading on, please check out 'Pope Same As Hitler' from last Saturday). "We should take a deep breath on these things and all have a sense of proportion. We seem to be living in a world where people have no sense of proportion," he told the ABC's Lateline program. "OK, they don't like what was said. I'm sure the Pope was not intending to attack Islam. He's expressed his regrets, and I think we should really move on."
SMH.com:
Iran's Supreme Leader, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, alleged the Pope's speech was part of a "crusade against Islam" launched by the US President, George Bush. On the sidelines of a United Nations meeting in New York, Mr Bush told the Malaysian Prime Minister, Abdullah Ahmad Badawi, that Benedict's apology was sincere.I love the fact that the West gets labelled insensitive to Islam while the Ayatollah confuses branches of Christanity. The Pope is Roman Catholic, while Bush is Southern-Evangelical-Compassionate-Conservative-Baptist-Somethingorother. And to think News In Briefs once criticized Catholicism for being long-winded.
In a move that almost guarantees me a fatwah, I'm going to call Ayatollah Khamenei a lunatic with no real grasp of western politics or religions, a man who is prepared to take on the USA with their (maybe) one nuke. Fool.
http://www.maniacmuslim.com/Stupid_Email_Forwards.html
Military Coup In Thailand
For those of you living under a rock, the Thai army under General Sonthi Boonyaratglin has seized control of the government, revoked the constitution, and declared martial law. Despite news services saying there is no connection between King Bhumibol Adulyadej and General Boonyaratglin, an early report from Bangkok said that the General had met with the King
before the military coup. News In Briefs has heard that the army has been concerned about the King's dignity in recent months especially with an election scandal that still hasn't died down. Expect this story to get a little dirtier before it disappears.
Peter Jackson Butchers Classic
Okay, so it's not NEWS, strictly speaking. He mangaged to mangle LOTR e few years back. But now, with the upcoming production of "Dambusters" it looks like history DOES repeat.
The issue is with the name of a dog. In reality, and the 1954 film, the dog was called 'nigger'. This was important because it became a codeword during the night raids of Nazi Germany's industrial areas. Jackson is concerned that if he uses the name he'll offend people, and if not he'll be accused of destroying a classic.
Don't worry Peter. We already know you butchered cinema greats and literary giants. We'll only complain when 'Darnbusters' is produced by SMOKING CAUSES LUNG DISEASE and revolves around the Elven campaign against the evil Osauron bin Leadfoot.
Ham-Fisted Segway
It seems that Segways don't just make you look like a goose while you're on them, they now try to throw you off. When users reach the 19km/h top speed, a software glitch can make the unit reverse, resulting in head and wrist injuries for the user, and fits of giggles for passers-by.
Man Loses Willy (Not Nelson)
From Ian Sample in LondonSeptember 19, 2006
A CHINESE man who had the world's first penis transplant had the organ removed two weeks later because he and his wife had a "severe psychological problem" with his new penis.
The man's penis was damaged beyond repair in an accident this year, leaving him with a one centimetre-long stump with which he was unable to urinate or have sexual intercourse.
"His quality of life was affected severely," said Dr Weilie Hu, a surgeon at Guangzhou General Hospital.
Doctors spent 15 hours attaching a 10-centimetre penis to the 44-year-old man after the parents of a brain-dead man half his age agreed to donate their son's organ.
The procedure, described in a case study due to appear in the journal European Urology next month, represents a big leap forward in transplant surgery.
After 10 days, tests revealed the organ had a rich blood supply and the man was able to urinate normally. Although the operation was a surgical success, surgeons said they had to remove the penis two weeks later.
"Because of a severe psychological problem of the recipient and his wife, the transplanted penis regretfully had to be cut off," Dr Hu said.
An examination of the organ showed no signs of it being rejected by the body, he said.
Jean-Michel Dubernard, the French surgeon who this year performed the world's first face transplant on a woman who had been attacked by a dog, said psychological factors were a serious issue for many patients receiving certain "allografts", or organs from donors. "Psychological consequences of hand and face allografts show that it is not so easy to use and see permanently a dead person's hands, nor is it easy to look in a mirror to see a dead person's face," Dr Dubernard wrote in European Urology.
"Clearly, in the Chinese case the failure at a very early stage was first psychological. It involved the recipient's wife and raised many questions."
In 2001, surgeons were forced to amputate the world's first transplanted hand from Clint Hallam, a 50-year-old New Zealander, who said he wanted the "hideous and withered" hand removed because he had become "mentally detached" from it.
Andrew George, a transplant expert at Imperial College London, said: "Doing a penis transplant should be no more complex than anything else. But it takes time for nerve sensations to kick in and it's not clear whether the patient would ever be able to have sex with it."
The Guardian
Tolkien Tale To Tantalise Teens
Lost JRR Tolkien novel
The Children of Hurin has been completed by his son and should be out around Easter. "It has seemed to me for a long time that there was a good case for presenting my father's long version of the legend of
The Children of Hurin as an independent work, between its own covers," Christopher Tolkien said. We believe the novel will involve the Children wandering around Middle Earth for a thousand pages while poorly crafted religious iconography and stilted metaphors are unleashed on the reader. Peter Jackson has already announced his desire to direct the film version of the sure-to-be-a-classic book. "I haven't had any ideas since
Bad Taste," Jackson told News In Briefs. "This Tolkien stuff is good for the bank
and the awards case."
High Times On The Road
Willie Nelson has been charged with misdemeanour drug possession by Louisiana Police who found 1 1/2 pounds of marijuana and 91 grams of magic mushrooms on his tour bus. Apparently everyone involved was cooperative, due in no small part to the weed they'd been smoking. For those who don't know, a pound of grass is about the size of a housebrick, and enough for some
real good times.
Teenager Charged With Murder
A 19-year-old has been charged with murder after the death of a teenager who was stabbed at a party in the NSW Hunter Valley.
Police said a 15-year-old boy suffered a stab wound to his abdomen during an argument at a party in bushland near Glendon Crescent at Glendale about 9pm last night.
The teenager, from Boolaroo, was taken to John Hunter Hospital in a critical condition where he had emergency surgery.
He died shortly after 9am today, police said.
A 19-year-old Glendale man has been charged with murder and is due to face Newcastle Local Court tomorrow.
'Jump The Couch'
Never let it be said that News In Briefs doesn't keep up with modern lingo.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=jump+the+couch
That's Not What I Meant!
"Pope Same As Hitler"
Now THAT got your attention. A lot of Catholics I know are already cranky with me, but this is a significant story. Here it is as it appeared in the Sydney Morning Herald.
September 16, 2006 - 1:23PMMuslims on Friday deplored remarks made by Pope Benedict on Islam and many of them said the Catholic leader should apologise in person to dispel the impression he had joined a campaign against their religion.
Influential Turkish legislator Salih Kapusuz fired back today, saying the Pope would go down in history ``in the same category as leaders such as Hitler and Mussolini.''
``He has the dark mentality that comes from the darkness of the Middle Ages,'' Kapusuz said.
Pakistan's legislature condemned Benedict, as did Lebanon's top Shi'ite cleric. "We demand that he apologises personally, and not through (Vatican) sources, to all Muslims for such a wrong interpretation," said Beirut-based Sayyed Mohammad Hussein Fadlallah.
In Gaza, angry Palestinians marched through the streets. "This is another Crusader war against the Arab and Muslim world," said Hamas official Ismail Radwan as he addressed some 5,000 chanting demonstrators.
And in Cairo, Egyptian demonstrators chanted, ``Down with the Pope!''
In Britain, the head of the Muslim Council urged Benedict to ``speak with responsibility and repudiate the Byzantine emperor's views.''
And in Iraq, warring Shi'ites and Sunnis paused from slaughtering each other to condemn the Pope. "This is the second time such an offence has been give before Ramadan," said Sheikh Salah al-Ubeidi, one of the aides to Shi'ite cleric Moqtada al-Sadr, referring to last year's publication of cartoons in a Danish paper sparking violent Muslim protests around the world.
The Muslim Brotherhood, the Arab world's largest group of political Islamists, demanded an apology from the Pope and called on the governments of Islamic countries to break relations with the Vatican if he does not make one.
The Sheikh of al-Azhar, one of the Sunni Muslim world's most prestigious seats of religious studies, said: "The Azhar asserts that these statements indicate clear ignorance of Islam.
"They attribute to Islam what it does not contain," the sheikh, Mohamed Sayed Tantawi, said in a statement on MENA.
Muslim leaders in New York demanded the Pope apologise.
``He is declaring war by his words,'' said Imam Kadhim Mohamad at the Ahlul Bayt Mosque on Atlantic Ave. in Brooklyn. ``He should either apologise or at least prove to the people that what he says is true. Otherwise, he should say nothing.''
Worshiper Ibrahim Abdul Rahman was especially incensed that Benedict quoted a line that spoke of Muhammed ordering that his faith be ``spread by the sword.''
``No sword was held to my neck,'' Rahman said. ``If the Pope really analyses who conquered by the sword, he needs to look back on his own religion. It would be nice of him to apologise.''
In a speech in Germany on Tuesday, the Pope appeared to endorse a Christian view, contested by most Muslims, that the early Muslims spread their religion by violence.
The 57-nation Organisation of the Islamic Conference (OIC), the world's largest Muslim body, said quotations used by the Pope represented a "character assassination of the Prophet Mohammad" and a "smear campaign".
"The OIC hopes that this campaign is not the prelude of a new Vatican policy towards Islam ... The OIC also hopes that the Vatican will issue statements that reflect its true position and views on Islam and Islamic teachings," it said.
The Pope on Tuesday repeated criticism of the Prophet Mohammad by the 14th century Byzantine Emperor Manuel II Palaeologus, who said everything Mohammad brought was evil "such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached".
The Pope, who used the terms "jihad" and "holy war" in his lecture, added "violence is incompatible with the nature of God and the nature of the soul".
Vatican spokesman Federico Lombardi defended the Pope's lecture and said he did not mean to offend Muslims.
"It was certainly not the intention of the Holy Father to undertake a comprehensive study of the jihad and of Muslim ideas on the subject, still less to offend the sensibilities of Muslim faithful," Lombardi told Vatican Radio.
A high-ranking Church source expressed fears for the Pope's safety, saying: "While I think the controversy will go away, it has done damage and if I were a security expert I'd be worried."
German Chancellor Angela Merkel told Bild newspaper the aim of the Pope's speech had been misunderstood.
"It was an invitation to dialogue between religions ... What Benedict XVI emphasised was a decisive and uncompromising renunciation of all forms of violence in the name of religion," she was quoted as saying in an article to appear on Saturday.
The Koran endorses the concept of jihad, often translated as holy war, but Muslims differ on conditions for it, with some saying it applies only for self-defence against external attack.
We Are Borg, Now Where's The Bar?
The Sydney Morning Herald has completely missed a story about the first woman ever fitted with a bionic arm that works. Apparently she uses it as we use organic limbs, via muscles and nerves and whatnot that interface with a computer in the bionic limb. The work was done at the Office of Scientific Intelligence under the watch of Oscar Goldman and the woman's childhood friend Steve Austin. We eagerly await news of her adventures now that she is better than she was before. Better. Stronger. Faster.
SMH meanwhile has a story about why android sports events are still a fair way off. "How do you describe a lemon to a robot," asked one scientist. Who cares, as long as he can make an appletini.
Not-So-Superman
Max Moore-Wilton, chairman of Sydney Airport Corporation, has outlined a plan which could see frequent fliers fast-tracked through security. While some see this as a good thing, others are not so sure.
"Hyphenated names usually mean trouble," Superman told News In Briefs. "But I do like the idea of my alter-ego not being strip searched. That Kent is one sick puppy."
When asked why Clark Kent would need to fly commercial anyway, Superman heard a cry for help from a nearby men's lavatory and rushed off.
Nobody Does It Better
We go again to smh.com.au for a follow up on the Today Tonight story from yesterday.
"IN THE depths of the Papuan jungle, there lives a six-year-old boy called Wa-Wa from the Korowai tribe, whose members are said to be among the last people on earth to practise cannibalism.
He has been marked as a target for the tribe's next act of ritual killing. But it's not his fellow tribesmen he need worry about.
The public relations machines of Channel Seven and Channel Nine were in a frenzy yesterday as they tried to put a spin on the story of Today Tonight host Naomi Robson's incarceration in Indonesia, after she travelled there to file a story on the Korowai. Robson and her crew were picked up by Indonesian authorities when they entered the politically sensitive province without the correct visas.
Channel Nine was at pains to point out that Robson was in Papua following up a story covered by the Nine network's 60 Minutes in May this year. Nine reporter Ben Fordham had travelled to film the remote tribe with Paul Raffaele, a writer for the Smithsonian Institution. During the assignment, they had met a six-year-old boy from the tribe whose parents had died. The tribe members were suspicious he was possessed by evil spirits, Fordham reported, so he faced being killed and eaten in the next 10 years. After filming finished, they left him there.
Of course, Channel Seven would never be so callous. Robson and her crew, who were travelling with Raffaele, planned to reach the boy and "save" him. Then they were arrested. Yesterday, Seven sent out a press release claiming Robson's "mission" had been "sabotaged by a rival Australian television network".
The head of Seven's news and public affairs, Peter Meakin, said his crew had secured a team of locals to help Wa-Wa "or whatever his name is".
But they suspected Fordham and other sources within Nine had tipped Indonesian authorities off about Robson's visa violations, to foil their rival's story. In doing so, Fordham was risking the child's life, Meakin said.
"I can't think of too many people who had a motive to shop us into the authorities for trying to save a child from being eaten other than them," Meakin said.
Fordham last night denied any sabotage. Earlier David Hurley, the head of news and current affairs at Nine, said the claim was "risible".
"They get off a plane and they have at least a dozen camera cases … If you try to do that in Jayapura with your hair extensions hanging off you and you say, 'We are here to write a story on cannibals', what do you really expect them to say?"
Hurley said Fordham and his crew had investigated rescuing the boy after their 60 Minutes story, but were advised that would only put him in greater danger.
And what of little Wa-Wa?
"What's going to happen to the little boy is now in the lap of the gods," Meakin said.
Robson and her colleagues were tight-lipped when they arrived at Jakarta airport late last night, repeatedly telling the Herald they had been ordered not to comment. The five were escorted by an embassy official.
The Herald understands the team will leave for Australia, via Singapore, this morning."
What A Day!
So much is happening I can't pick a story to poke fun at. So here's this morning's News In Briefs.
Today Tonight presenter Naomi Robson and friends have been
detained in West Papua. It's understood the Australian government is petitioning Indonesia NOT to release them. "We're sick of it. Used car salesmen are dodgy, we get it!"
Paris Hilton has been mobbed after a fashion show in New York. While reports say that she was surrounded by photographers, we just have to believe one of them was holding a knife.
Australian singer Toby Rand's free ticket to rock'n'roll glory has been pulled from him at the last minute after the outright favourite failed to win the US reality TV show Rockstar: Supernova.Canadian rocker Lukas Rossi was crowned the winner this morning and has now earned the right to front drummer Tommy Lee's band, Supernova.
Rossi, who has similar looks to Australian Idol contestant Lee Harding, is described on the Rockstar: Supernova website as a gifted singer with a "Jeff Buckley meets Freddie Mercury" style. We can only assume that means he's got bad teeth but will get them fixed before outing himself as gay, getting drunk, and drowning in the Mississippi.
Now the BIG story is the shooting at Dawson College in Montreal, Canada. Details are sketchy but it looks like there are six dead, several injured, and the shooter may be dead also. The gunman was allegedly dressed in a black trenchcoat and had a 'cold face'.
I don't want to make light of the situation, but odds are good one of the following will be named as responsible: The Matrix, Marilyn Manson, GTA San Andreas, bullys, heavy metal, violent films, video games, comic books, Lord of the Rings, Leonardo DiCaprio, Elijah Wood, and Lindsay Lohan.
LONELYGIRL15 has been outed as a fraud! The youtube.com star is Kiwi Jessica Rose, an actress who joined forces with a couple of filmmakers to create a marketable brand name. Full story at http://www.smh.com.au/articles/2006/09/13/1157826998165.html
Next time you're at youtube, check out 'Chad Vader' or 'Ask A Ninja' instead.
Croc Bites Back
OJ, me and my mate the taxman, by Paul Hogan(published today at http://www.smh.com.au/news/national/my-mate-the-taxman-by-hoges/2006/09/13/1157827020116.html)To whom it may concern,
According to The Sydney Morning Herald on August 24, 2006, I am in so much trouble with the ATO (notice how I just use their initials to protect their identity) that I have hired a "tax fraud specialist", a Washington lawyer named Scott Michel.
You got me. Almost. The last problem I had with the ATO was in 1972 when they claimed that I had "fudged" the overheads on my earnings from my pub "chook raffles". I did hire a lawyer then, my cousin "Shifty Joe" Hogan. He lost the case. He was disbarred in 1973. Since then my relationship with the ATO has been excellent. Probably because they were, by as far as you can throw your hat, the biggest beneficiaries of my movie endeavours.
In fact they even sent me Christmas cards every year … until I became a non-resident for tax purposes. I did write to them suggesting that, unlike me, my friends and our investors, they did not risk one cent, or one minute of their time, therefore it would only be fair to swap their share for ours. To date I have received no reply.
I do have a slight problem with "tax fraud specialist Scott Michel". I had never heard of him. Maybe one of my associates, "bankrupt" publican John "the Goanna" Cornell, or "colourful racing identity" accountant "Big Tony" Stewart, hired him. Not only had they never heard of him, he had never heard of us … until the SMH made the connection.
Here it is, pay attention, it's tricky. My tax returns are done by the reputable international accounting firm Ernst & Young.
About 18 months ago their Sydney office sought advice from their US office regarding my California state tax obligations. The US office then sought tax advice from another tax specialist, Michael Pfeifer. Michael Pfeifer works at the Washington law firm Caplin & Drysdale. Aha! Here's the link … Scott Michel works there too!! Of course you, the SMH, already know this information. It appears you know more about my business than I do. How come? Here's a headline for you even more honest than "Hogan hires tax fraud lawyer". I was once a client of CAA Talent Agency. So was O.J. Simpson. Hence "Hogan suspect in Nicole Simpson murder".
In closing, I would like to thank the SMH and The Australian for including a photo of me and referring to me in every second story about tax fraud, no matter who the story is about. As I am sure is your intent, the free publicity is a big help to me in any business ventures I try to develop in other countries.
A Grateful Reader
Paul Hogan
C/-Villa D'Skase, Spain.
PS A special note to all members of my large extended family. Please stop asking about your visa/debit cards. They must have been lost in the mail …
MORE Aussie Stupidity
Apparently Steve Irwin fans have decided to take their revenge on stingrays by chopping their tails off. Ten rays have been found tail-less in southern Queensland a week after the Crocodile Hunter's death. Friends of the Irwin family have expressed their dismay at the acts, which they say run contrary to everything Steve stood for.
Das Musik
Here's a production photo from 'Das Boot The Musical'. It follows the story of a young boy swept into the world of submarines and cabaret. Tim Rice and Elton John are reported to be working on the score.
A Nation Forgets
"I am happy to join with you today in what will go down in history as the greatest demonstration for freedom in the history of our nation.
Five score years ago, a great American, in whose symbolic shadow we stand today, signed the Emancipation Proclamation. This momentous decree came as a great beacon light of hope to millions of Negro slaves who had been seared in the flames of withering injustice. It came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of their captivity.
But one hundred years later, the Negro still is not free. One hundred years later, the life of the Negro is still sadly crippled by the manacles of segregation and the chains of discrimination. One hundred years later, the Negro lives on a lonely island of poverty in the midst of a vast ocean of material prosperity. One hundred years later, the Negro is still languished in the corners of American society and finds himself an exile in his own land. And so we've come here today to dramatize a shameful condition.
In a sense we've come to our nation's capital to cash a check. When the architects of our republic wrote the magnificent words of the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence, they were signing a promissory note to which every American was to fall heir. This note was a promise that all men, yes, black men as well as white men, would be guaranteed the "unalienable Rights" of "Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness." It is obvious today that America has defaulted on this promissory note, insofar as her citizens of color are concerned. Instead of honoring this sacred obligation, America has given the Negro people a bad check, a check which has come back marked "insufficient funds."
But we refuse to believe that the bank of justice is bankrupt. We refuse to believe that there are insufficient funds in the great vaults of opportunity of this nation. And so, we've come to cash this check, a check that will give us upon demand the riches of freedom and the security of justice.
We have also come to this hallowed spot to remind America of the fierce urgency of Now. This is no time to engage in the luxury of cooling off or to take the tranquilizing drug of gradualism. Now is the time to make real the promises of democracy. Now is the time to rise from the dark and desolate valley of segregation to the sunlit path of racial justice. Now is the time to lift our nation from the quicksands of racial injustice to the solid rock of brotherhood. Now is the time to make justice a reality for all of God's children.
It would be fatal for the nation to overlook the urgency of the moment. This sweltering summer of the Negro's legitimate discontent will not pass until there is an invigorating autumn of freedom and equality. Nineteen sixty-three is not an end, but a beginning. And those who hope that the Negro needed to blow off steam and will now be content will have a rude awakening if the nation returns to business as usual. And there will be neither rest nor tranquility in America until the Negro is granted his citizenship rights. The whirlwinds of revolt will continue to shake the foundations of our nation until the bright day of justice emerges.
But there is something that I must say to my people, who stand on the warm threshold which leads into the palace of justice: In the process of gaining our rightful place, we must not be guilty of wrongful deeds. Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred. We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline. We must not allow our creative protest to degenerate into physical violence. Again and again, we must rise to the majestic heights of meeting physical force with soul force.
The marvelous new militancy which has engulfed the Negro community must not lead us to a distrust of all white people, for many of our white brothers, as evidenced by their presence here today, have come to realize that their destiny is tied up with our destiny. And they have come to realize that their freedom is inextricably bound to our freedom.
We cannot walk alone.
And as we walk, we must make the pledge that we shall always march ahead.
We cannot turn back.
There are those who are asking the devotees of civil rights, "When will you be satisfied?" We can never be satisfied as long as the Negro is the victim of the unspeakable horrors of police brutality.
We can never be satisfied as long as our bodies, heavy with the fatigue of travel, cannot gain lodging in the motels of the highways and the hotels of the cities. *We cannot be satisfied as long as the negro's basic mobility is from a smaller ghetto to a larger one. We can never be satisfied as long as our children are stripped of their self-hood and robbed of their dignity by a sign stating: "For Whites Only."* We cannot be satisfied as long as a Negro in Mississippi cannot vote and a Negro in New York believes he has nothing for which to vote. No, no, we are not satisfied, and we will not be satisfied until "justice rolls down like waters, and righteousness like a mighty stream."
I am not unmindful that some of you have come here out of great trials and tribulations. Some of you have come fresh from narrow jail cells. And some of you have come from areas where your quest -- quest for freedom left you battered by the storms of persecution and staggered by the winds of police brutality. You have been the veterans of creative suffering. Continue to work with the faith that unearned suffering is redemptive. Go back to Mississippi, go back to Alabama, go back to South Carolina, go back to Georgia, go back to Louisiana, go back to the slums and ghettos of our northern cities, knowing that somehow this situation can and will be changed.
Let us not wallow in the valley of despair, I say to you today, my friends.
And so even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.
I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal."
I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia, the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.
I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.
I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.
I have a dream today!
I have a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of "interposition" and "nullification" -- one day right there in Alabama little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.
I have a dream today!
I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, and every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight; "and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed and all flesh shall see it together."
This is our hope, and this is the faith that I go back to the South with.
With this faith, we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith, we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. With this faith, we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle together, to go to jail together, to stand up for freedom together, knowing that we will be free one day.
And this will be the day -- this will be the day when all of God's children will be able to sing with new meaning:
My country 'tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing.
Land where my fathers died, land of the Pilgrim's pride,
From every mountainside, let freedom ring!
And if America is to be a great nation, this must become true.
And so let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire.
Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York.
Let freedom ring from the heightening Alleghenies of Pennsylvania.
Let freedom ring from the snow-capped Rockies of Colorado.
Let freedom ring from the curvaceous slopes of California.
But not only that:
Let freedom ring from Stone Mountain of Georgia.
Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of Tennessee.
Let freedom ring from every hill and molehill of Mississippi.
From every mountainside, let freedom ring.
And when this happens, when we allow freedom ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual:
Free at last! Free at last!
Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!
-Martin Luther King Jr.
The House of Representatives passed the same measure on Wednesday and must make a technical change to reconcile it with the Senate's. Bush was expected to sign it soon afterward.
After a high-stakes negotiation, Bush got much of what he wanted in the bill to continue the once-secret CIA program of detention and aggressive interrogations of suspects that critics said amounted to torture.
Alabama Sen. Jeff Sessions said the bill should not "create a long-term battle with the courts over everybody that's being detained. It is a function of the military and the executive branch to conduct a war."
